I have been up early and working on our new website again today. This time on our ‘ask the expert’ section which will start off with advice you can access directly and develop into guest spots for people we like who are expert in the field of parental alienation. Top of our list is Brian Ludmer, who co-wrote the brilliant book The High Conflict Custody Battle with Amy Baker and Michael Bone, we love this book and the chapter written by Brian who has written widely on the issue and who is hugely skilled as an attorny, in understanding and developing strategies for managing parental alienation. I am delighted that he will join us as our new website launches soon.
But back to our ‘ask the expert’ section which will offer guest spots by people who work in the field of PA in the UK as well as across the world. In the time since we opened the Family Separation Clinic in London, we have built a wide network of people with whom we have worked who really ‘get’ what is going on in parental alienation. We will be inviting some of them to write guest blogs for you and then asking them to answer your questions. We have Barristers, Solicitors, Family Court Practitioners and Counsellors, Mediators and Social Workers . We also have parents themselves, both alienated and alientating and finally we have young people who were affected by alienation when they were children, who we helped back then and who have now recovered. Young people who want to help alienated and alienating parents to understand what it is really like to suffer this horrible problem.
I can hear you asking how do we get the alienating parent to participate in this. More on this specific element later, for now though remember this. Parental alienation is a problem with a human face. Alienating parents are not monsters, they are people. Whilst alienation of your child is a monstrous act, turning the whole group of people called alienating parents into monsters, simply removes the humanity from the equation and mirrors the alienation reaction in the child.
We work with alienating parents, who are human beings in all of their frailty and whilst it may be surprising, those who recover and who help to change their child’s perspective, also want to help other people. Parents who were once aligned with their children and even those engaged in alienation, will also write for our new site, giving us a unique opportunity to open dialogue across the divide.
Our ask the expert section starts with the top ten things to ask anyone who tells you that they work with parental alienation. Here they are.
1. How many children have you been successful in reuniting with their parent in the past five years?
2. How many times have you been cross examined in a case concerning parental alienation in the past five years?
3. Can you provide citation references to the case you have worked in, how many of those cases are published cases?
4. What is the single most important element to address in helping any parent to deal with parental alienation in the court process?
5. When would you consider therapy may be possible in a case of alienation?
6. What differentiation protocols do you use to help you to decide how to treat alienation?
7. What route would you take to reuniting a child with a parent after five years of rejecting behaviour in the child?
8. Which other professionals would you regard as essential in treating a case of parental alienation?
9. Who can I speak to who you have helped in the past five years?
10. How much will you charge me to do this work and what guarantee will you give me that it will be money well spent?
On our new site we will be advising you of the best answers to expect to all of these questions and more. We want to help you to spend wisely, make the right choices and get the best outcomes for your children. Experts we trust, who we know bring good outcomes will be clearly highlighted and we will always be clear about the information and advice we are giving you and what you can expect to achieve from it. For too long, too many people have made too much money out of promising outcomes that are then not delivered. We want to make you not only alienation aware but alienation expert aware so that you do not have to succumb to the lofty pronouncements of people who charge much but deliver little.
We will also have a section for recommendations from parents themselves so please, when we launch, get ready to write and send us information about people who have helped you. This is our chance to create a network of alienation aware parents and professionals that other people can learn from.
From now on, I will personally be dedicating a lot of my time to making sure that this network gets off the ground and works hard for you. I invite all of you, parents and professionals to join us as we create what is, for me, a real route to making change for children and families affected by parental alienation happen in the here and now. Putting power into your hands is our goal. Making the UK and beyond alienation aware and capable of tackling the problem at source is how we will achieve it. Not long to go now until lift off. Looking forward to joining with all of you soon.
Our ask the expert section will offer guest blogs, advice, Q&A sessions and more. Our new site (name to be revealed shortly) is built and we are getting ready to launch.
Most of the information on the site will be free of charge but there will be a cost to join the forums and our webinars and to download some of the larger items such as podcasts. We aim however to give you as much as we can for as low a cost as possible, helping you to help yourself without having to mortgage your house and your life to pay expert fees. Where you do need experts we will provide a trusted expert section on the site with testimonials from parents themselves.
Welcome to the world of the empowered parent.